Yes, I jumped off a chair, got my feet all twisted in the back, fell hard with only my hands to stop my fall, and broke both my arms. Both breaks were "minor", although all kinds of painful for about 48 hours. The triumphant leap off the chair, to look at the beautiful cursive alphabet that I'd just finished hanging in my brand new classroom, happened on Saturday, Feb. 17th. My bones are healing well. The doctor told me to move them and do as much as I can. They're not the kind of break that needs casts. I've already got a lot of mobility and range of motion back. It's just strength that I still need to build up now. I'm still in the process of figuring out worker's comp. and where to go for physical therapy.
A different kind of brokeness, that's still painful and in that killer initial 48 hours is happening to my heart right now. I said goodbye to Jessie today. Goodbye, forever. I followed a still small voice of inspiration and went over to the homeless shelter for an hour before I drove home this evening. I wanted to talk to his mom--say thank you, congratulations, and by the way, sorry, but Jessie's suspended from the bus again, just in case you were considering sending him to school one last day tomorow. She didn't make it back to the shelter before we had to leave, but Easter and I hung out with Jessie, his 8-year-old sister Angel, and his 11-year-old brother Nico. We sat on the floor in the hall of the shelter and chatted and joked and just enjoyed each other's company for a tender, final hour. Jessie brought out their four little books of family photos and showed me each one and told me all the accompanying names and stories. At one point Nico was teasing him about how he used to be bad. And then Jessie said this unforgettable line about how, yes, he had to do community service for getting in trouble a few times, "But," he says "that was before I met you." And the cutest, sweetest, most heart-breaking thing about that line, is that he didn't mean that it was a long time ago. He's saying it's becuase of me--or because of our relationship, rather. For the last eighteen months he's worked very hard at being good, he's worked hard at being good for me.
Here's a copy of his goodbye letter. If you call me in the next week or two, ask how my arms are healing, but also ask me about my heart. I think my arms will be completely healed before my heart gets all its strength back again---I love this child so much. It's always been hard for me to have faith but I have to trust and believe that some kind of higher power will take good care of him.
Dear Jessie,
Thank you for always working so hard. You have always done everything I’ve asked you to do. Last year, you worked hard as part of our basketball team. You came to practices and kept playing even though we didn’t always win. You’ve always finished your assignments in class and you’ve always done thoughtful, great work. You haven’t always turned in your homework but I know you’ve been doing it, most of the time. You’ve improved your reading a lot this year and I think you’ve learned at least sixty new vocabulary words. You helped the little kids and me with Read Naturally without ever complaining. You’ve been an incredible friend to Gabe and to many other students. You’ve been an excellent leader in our class this year. I am so proud of you. Thank you so much for doing all of these things.
Remember how much I believe in you. I know you can make good choices all of the time. You’re so smart and talented. I believe you will accomplish all of your dreams. You will go to college, play football and become a scientist, an engineer, a newspaper editor, a teacher, a mathematician, or whatever you want to become. Keep your grades up. Don’t quit school. Hang out with friends that will help you make good choices. You have a great family and I know you’ll make them all proud. You will be strong like Jackie Robinson: strong enough to BE KIND, strong enough to NOT FIGHT, and strong enough to NEVER GIVE UP. Remember how Jackie was strong on the inside and the outside—you also have that kind of inside strength.
Give people (adults and kids) a chance to get to know you and they will like you. Remember the goals on your Y contract: follow directions and be kind. These two goals are like a magic spell that will help your new teacher and other adults see how incredible you are.
I’ve really enjoyed having you as a student.
With much love,
